Polly Katherine Hilton

‘There is nothing gutsier to me than a person announcing that their story is one that deserves to be told, especially if that person is a woman.  As hard as we have worked and as far as we have come, there are still so many forces conspiring to tell women that our concerns are petty…that personal writing by women is no more than an exercise in vanity and that we should appreciate this new world for women, sit down and shut up.  But I want to tell my stories…' – Lena Dunham, Not That Kind of Girl: A Young Woman Tells You What She's 'Learned'

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All Adventurous Women Do 

I dare you to pick up a blank sheet of paper or open a blank document on your computer.  I dare you to take a deep breath and write your story.  Hold nothing back - no gory detail.  No skeletons left in your most hidden of closets.  Write the stories that would make your grandma blush and the current version of yourself look away in either embarrassment, heart-break, or hysterical fits of laughter.  

If you had to divide your life into headings, what would the various chapters of your story be called?  All of this sounds awfully dangerous (even sitting here typing this post such a call to action feels almost hypocritical as I myself do not know if I have the courage to tell my own story in such a unveiled and fearless way).  It seems dangerous to be so utterly unguarded and well, honest.

The back of the book warns its readers that the text is dangerous… and dangerous it is, as well as heartbreaking, challenging, hysterical and simultaneously empowering.  I, of course, am talking about Lena Dunham’s first foray into the wonderful world of hardcover and eBooks (versus her usual kingdom of scripts and screen) with her heavily debated autobiography Not That Kind of Girl: A Young Woman Tells You What She's 'Learned'

If you're reading this post, thinking you're going to receive yet another commentary on the moral implications of Lena’s controversial actions she describes throughout the book (actions that have been ripped apart by major news outlets and the moms of America alike), you wont find that here (spoiler alert).  What you will find however, is this writer’s honest opinion on the overall book itself (the chapter Who Moved My Uterus excluded) and hopefully, find a reason to stand up and tell your own story, as is your right.  Come on - 'all adventurous women do.'

Not That Kind of Girl is a gutsy triumph for women storytellers and is an example of shameless bravery to all would-be women writers

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More Than A Figurehead          

It’s safe to say, I’m a forever fan of Lena Dunham’s.  As a wannabe writer and actress myself, she's turned into the HBO figurehead or spirit animal for my eclectic and driven brand of women (the liberal art school grads who want to take the world by storm).  Millennials are inspired by her, feminists worship her, and writers want to write more like her.  But here’s the thing, for all the hype is worth, it's backed by groundbreaking accomplishment.  As the first female recipient of a Directors Guild award for Outstanding Director in a Comedy Series, Lena is paving the way for a future generation of women in the entertainment industry.  In addition to this accomplishment, she's been nominated for a whopping eight Emmy Awards (as a writer, director, actress, and producer) and has won two Golden Globe Awards for her work on Girls (which if you don’t currently watch, you should… it returns to HBO on January 11th).  She works to employ women, writes three-dimensional female characters for screen, and all the while remains authentic and seemingly approachable - meaning she's the real deal.  Lena Dunham is on my short list of inspiring women I would love to take to coffee to simply pick her brain and thank her for her bravery in an industry that so vehemently belittles, objectifies and makes far to light of women’s stories.             

Purchase Not That Kind Of Girl here!  

NOT That Kind of Girl

While I remain a forever fan of Lena Dunham herself and think her kick ass devil-may-care attitude both onscreen and off make her an authentic, Hollywood rarity and a treasure, I can ultimately say after reading her book, Not That Kind of Girl, I’m, well…not that kind of girl.  For this reader at least, the overall tone of her text turned me off in such a way that (I'm sorry to say) made me hesitant to readily recommend it (I'm not someone who is easily offended. It takes a LOT to get me to a point where I feel something has crossed the line).  However, I am a firm believer in the phrase ‘eat the fish leave the bones,’ and while the tone of Not That Kind of Girl was riddled with metaphors and descriptions that I believe were included only for shock value sake, there were moments worth savoring thanks to sheer empowerment (Honestly, that final paragraph in the introduction, her decision to include her food journals, and the final two paragraphs on page 20…more than fantastic and empowering). 

I believe that in an effort to appeal to a larger demographic and perhaps appear even more conversational, or in an effort to be funny, the meat of this book got peppered with some tasteless and offensive language (and I’m not talking about cussing…if you compare your tone of voice within the opening phrases of your book to ‘a government worker that’s snapped and, if pushed hard enough, might blow up the hostages…tied up in the basement...,' that’s going to strike a nerve with someone who lived through the Boston Marathon bombing...that's going to offend me).  I struggled while reading, to understand why, Lena felt the need to write in such a dangerous and at sometimes, vulgar, tone, when to me, her life as it is, remains interesting enough without the added shock of (I hate to say it) over-indulgent language.

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I would love to thank her for her bravery in an industry that so vehemently belittles, objectifies and makes far to light of women’s stories.

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What I’ve Learned 

While I may not necessarily agree with the tone of the text, I am glad I read Lena Dunham’s book and I do challenge you to read Not That Kind of Girl.  Read it in spite of my hesitant recommendation.  It addresses relevant topics for my generation and is what ‘all adventurous women’ are reading.  Read it with a grain of salt.  Form your own opinions about her actions rather than sticking to only the twitter feed highlights.  Let yourself be offended, inspired, and at moments uplifted by her honest struggle through young adulthood.  Not That Kind of Girl is a gutsy triumph for women storytellers and is an example of shameless bravery to all would-be women writers, and for that I say, Bravo Miss Dunham!           

 

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