Kelly Lindenau

This week’s episode of The Bachelorette opened up right where last week’s episode left off: manipulative adulterer DeMario is begging Rachel to give him one more chance, throwing out all the lines every girl has most definitely heard before.  He wants to prove to her that he’s changed and that he just wants one more chance, and luckily our girl Rachel doesn’t buy it and sends him right back out the door.  This, in addition to last week’s ‘get the f**k out,’ has really increased the amount of respect and admiration I have for this woman and while the show focuses on a game for love, she’s a force to be reckoned with.

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Rachel Lindsay on ABC's The Bachelorette

After the drama from that encounter dissipates, it’s time for the rose ceremony.  Blake, who can’t seem to keep Lucas’ name out of his mouth, once again makes his time with Rachel all about how he believes that Lucas is there for the wrong reasons.  Lucas, coincidentally, spends his time with Rachel outlining a story about Blake standing over his bed and eating a banana.  Thoroughly weirded out, Rachel briefly confronts Blake about the encounter before moving onto the rose ceremony.  Her roses were handed out, and quite obviously Blake and Lucas were the ones to go in addition to Jamey, who I personally didn’t even realize was on the show.  During their final confessionals, which were conveniently located feet apart, Blake overhears Lucas talking about him and the two suddenly get into an argument that I’m pretty sure I’ve seen before during recess in fourth grade.

Cut to the next day, with the introduction of a date card that’s bringing Jonathan, Alex, Fred, Bryan, Will, and Peter to the Ellen Show!  When Rachel explains to Ellen that Jonathan tickled her after he walked out of the limo, Ellen questioned why he was still there, saying what everyone in America has been thinking.  No offense, but labeling yourself as a ‘tickle monster’ is a one-way ticket to being single.  The date consists of the guys stripping and Magic Mike dancing through the crowd, much to the delight of Rachel and all the women there.  The date ends with a quick game of ‘I Never,’ and once again Rachel brings up how she can’t view Fred as anything other than that little boy she watched at camp.  Even after a kiss later in the night, Rachel can’t shake the image from her head and says goodbye to poor Fred, making him the fourth man (fifth, if you count DeMario) of the episode to say goodbye.  Alex ends up getting the group date rose, and back at the mansion Anthony is gearing up for his one-on-one date.  Rachel and Anthony spend the day riding horses down Rodeo Drive, popping in and out of stores and shopping their way along.  I didn’t see any crazy chemistry between them, but Rachel must have felt something and awarded Anthony with the date rose.

Meanwhile, Eric is winning the award for being the most insecure and whiny man in the house by complaining about his lack of progress and how he doesn’t believe she’s taking this seriously.  Iggy ends up overhearing this and calls him out, and the men get into a small argument.  When the date card arrives at the mansion, Brady, Eric, Bryce, Dean, Kenny, Lee, Adam, and Jack are invited to go mud-wrestling along with Rachel and some familiar faces from seasons past: Corinne, Raven, Alexis, and Jasmine.  When Raven asks about the opinions the guys have on other guys, Eric’s name seems to come out of a lot of their mouths, all of them voicing their concerns about his intentions.  Raven mentions that to Rachel, who was actually looking forward to getting to know him better and is a little upset by this fact.

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While the show focuses on a game for love, Rachel’s a force to be reckoned with.

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In terms of mud-wrestling, Brady comes out victorious over Kenny ‘Pretty Boy Pitbull’ King, yet doesn’t receive the group date rose.  Eric does, after a confrontation with the guys who can’t seem to stop talking about him.  While I want to feel bad for Eric, I just can’t bring myself to do so.  He’s too whiny and needy, and a girl like Rachel needs someone confident and independent.  During the rose ceremony, Iggy once again brings up Eric’s name and by this point, Eric’s had enough after Rachel tells him she’s very on-guard and has her ‘antennas’ up around him.  This leads to him charging into the living room ready for a fight.  In typical Bachelorette fashion, the show ends on a cliffhanger leaving us loyal fans with no choice but to tune in two weeks to see where this feud goes, and who gets sent home with their tail between their legs.

 

Kelly is a rising senior at Rider University majoring in History and English Writing.  Aside from loving the Bachelorette, she also loves writing, running, and reading.

 

Comments (1)

  1. Meagan Hooper

This is hilarious, Kelly!! Now I have to watch!

 
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